Saturday, February 23, 2013

restart button

i've been talking so much about what i want to do.
i've been thinking and talking about redoing my room for a few months now...

and the other night, i was fast asleep, woke up wide awake & checked my wall to make sure a picture hadn't fallen down, the one of me and my grampa. then as i lay back down i said out loud, i miss my grampa. i still miss you.

it was strange.

it feels good to take down everything from my walls and restart. i'm going to put my pictures back up and not have them so scattered.

i love the feeling of newness.
i keep writing that change is positive.

i'm believing in good things for my future and am comforted by the verse

surely goodness & mercy will follow me, all the days of my life.

it's incredible that goodness is paired with mercy, as if He knows how much we'll need both. mercy has helped get me through the hard nights and goodness has filled my days with positivity and life.

i feel rested. it's weird not being afraid of tears anymore. they used to keep me there.

in releasing them, i don't feel trapped or ashamed of weakness. i feel powerful to make the choice to release.
tomorrow will be spent eating good food for breakfast. baking. and finishing up my room project.
i'm filling my walls with pictures. hung a lot nicer than before...being more thought out...and putting up words that inspire people have written with amazing insights on them.