Monday, July 28, 2014

i didn't know i was brave, until someone told me.

moving my life into a new place, uprooting myself to root myself deeper in life…takes courage and bravery.
it's been an emotional ride, to say the least.

i tend to avoid my feelings when they're not sunshine and golden, because i feel, guilty? not sure if that's the right word to describe it.
but my feelings are valid, things are hard when you move.
right now i'm in process of feeling settled into my new home, my new city.
i want to explore, but it's taken me a while to actually feel READY. ready to venture out, meet new people and put myself out there.

there's so much safety in things i've known. i've felt comfortable in my old home, when i moved there six years ago i knew i would be surrounded by quite a few friends, and had family 30 minutes from my home.

now i'm here, back to the beginning…to hard memories, and to realizing how much healing has occurred in my life over the years.

i uprooted myself to go deeper into adventures with the Lord, learning more of myself and true character, but mainly just following and learning to trust. to practice trusting and to rely more on the Lord.

i'm learning to celebrate things, even small this point in life even the small things are pretty big.
for instance: i went to church tonight and said hi to someone. i celebrated that.

i then went to a friend's house and listened to her story of the adventure she had last week…then i shared where i was at. I ended up staying late, even though it wasn't in my normal schedule i've set up for myself…

moving is hard, restarting is hard. but being known by others in a new context feels good. it's just getting to a point of being ready to get to know new people. and to find a steady rhythm in my new life out here.

so many things twist and turn throughout the journey. my consistency is in Jesus and the way He shows himself constantly faithful and beautiful. i know it's not much for this blog post, but hopefully there will be more to write in a bit.