choosing to change my perspective today.

too much.

Foy Vance - Be with Me

emotional.

i was watching the blindside last night with my amazing housemates and i almost lost it three times.
as you know, or maybe you don't...i do not cry in movies very often at all, but seriously....i am very emotional
these days. it's weird, but i guess that is just how i am this week.

right now i'm listening to William Fitzsimmons...who you should probably check out if you haven't already heard
of him. i first heard him on a friends myspace page *back when i had myspace...oh jeez* and he's one of my favorite night
time music to listen to. you should buy the until we are ghosts album, because its my personal favorite...but that's just if you want to. i am still not good at links, but someday...i will be a link poster for sure.
His voice is just so relaxing and his lyrics are really goooood. i just like stories in music.
One of his songs is called please don't go. and you would think *or at least i would...* that it would be about a break up
but its not, its about something bad that happened in his childhood and being able to express that in song. SO powerful to me.

sometimes i wish i could do that, but only sometimes...


anyway.
if anyone wants to throw a prayer up for my silly little heart, please feel free...its been a weird week and i think next week will probably be weird too. that's just how this month goes usually.

lovelove.

a video of his music!
:::

today i like:
early morning coffee w/ the dinosaur.
seeing chace smile!
getting to talk w/ petra & plan for this weekend.
truly enjoying where i'm at with life...
talking about my job.
trusting in His goodness.
texting emma about plans for today.
thinking about Julie & how much effort she's put into her album!
getting pumped about her show on saturday! so close!!
listening to the beatles.
singing loudly in the car.
letting my hair be messy.
smelling good.
my sparkly toe nails!
thinking about how funny it was dancing w/ kris at the wedding

that's all for now.

new favorite song:::

you & i by ingrid michaelson

go listen!
xoxoo

finding it.

i'm trying to find it, find my peace.
i'm on the lookout. i'm taking deep breath's...
i'm trying to obey.

i'm trying to laugh more, to enjoy everything surrounding
me. sometimes it is not easy.
i want to learn from each situation and see the positive. to
see your hands guiding my steps.
i want everyday to count.
i want to trust, but i would rather just see results...from all of it.

isn't that selfish?

list.

--i love my siblings. so much, they are such beautiful people. they are so determined in this life, to succeed...very dedicated people. I like that Alexis is such a great teacher & actress...and that she is so gorgeous. I like that Zachary took a while to figure out exactly what he wanted to do, but now that he is doing it...he's all in. I really admire that about my siblings. there are more things, but that's all for this post.
--i liked today. it was so beautiful, even if i did arrive to work 30 minutes early, i got to catch up with a friend...and eat my breakfast. i like that i had time to make CayeD coffee & write her a love note. I liked that on the walk home, a lady stopped her car so that i could cross safely and she was very nice about it. [[yesterday we walked across the street and almost got run over by a bro. does anyone remember bro's? i thought i left all of those guys behind me in CA...bummer]] i like that i got everything accomplished on the list of things to do at work today, it was nice. that is one of the best feelings to me, accomplishing tasks. <3 it.
--texting Jules this morning made me happy, because she brings joy to my heart.


goal.

*staying organized this week. that is my goal. i want to keep everything upstairs clean this week and not let it go to shambles, like my normal routine...yikes*

time to clean.

i really want my life to be God centered...sometimes i lose sight of it in the jumble of things in life.
i love life so much though, its such a blessing working here. My job is so fun & sometimes i forget about how fun life can be if i make it fun...i really enjoy working w/ my friend Hannah and having alone time cleaning in the housekeeping department just listening to music, chilling, and listening to good jams...
check out the new flobots! so good.
my latest favorite is Emme Packer. I usually don't like women vocals, but she is GOOD. Emme Packer! click-ity click there <
I sometimes think God speaks to me most through music and luckily, i surround myself with it.
I enjoy all kinds...because i learn from it, in weird ways i guess. I really like her lyrics. my favorite songs are "if i had a kite" and "man that saves" from the album earlier. I just like the way she did if i had a kite with the build up and stuff.....and for man that saves, i like how true it is. God just loves us so much. i guess i forget about the love when unfortunate things happen to me. I get so angry and i usually direct it at Him, but He didn't do it, He's the one who comforts...*& all the past hate pain and blame, it could just be swept away, cause that's the kind of man that saves.*
sometimes i just need to be reminded of the love that covers all my sin and craziness. I guess its easy to lose my balance when i forget who holds my world.

Getting to work here is fun and interesting because i'm not always sure how i will pay my rent *or at least that is the story this year* but i am not stressed about it anymore. At first i was very scared and overwhelmed, but then i got this huge peace about it. I love that He gives peace that passes all understanding. its exciting to me.

Have a nice day everyone.

Happy Birthday To My Mom!!



this is a woman who has supported me throughout every endeavor in my life...
who has held me through the toughest battles & let me loose when i needed
to stand on my own two feet...even if i didn't necessarily want to.

she has loved me with all she has, encouraged me daily, & helped me grow.
She pointed out the good things in myself when i was unable to see the positives,
she was there to help...
i just love her so much. I am very thankful for her life.